廿三條的看法/廿三條的詩辭歌賦

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皇家馬德里領隊~~~Alex ___
Username: 20021083

Registered: 04-2003
Posted on Friday, July 18, 2003 - 01:29 pm:   

大家對廿三條有咩看法呢??? 請大家發表一下自己意見or 發表廿三條的詩辭歌賦la!!!!!
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皇家馬德里領隊~~~Alex ___
Username: 20021083

Registered: 04-2003
Posted on Friday, July 18, 2003 - 01:40 pm:   

<廿川> 佚名
有廿三,失業高;無廿三,有病毒。
廿三一來,葉梁辭職;廿三一去,肺炎又來。
請加強老師給評語
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名字只是一個符號
Username: 20021151

Registered: 04-2003
Posted on Friday, July 18, 2003 - 02:50 pm:   

唔好甘晒位啦你!
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陳加強
Username: ckk

Registered: 04-2003
Posted on Saturday, July 19, 2003 - 10:20 am:   

很明顯,這是一首著意經營的作品──作品中「有」「無」相對,「來」「去」相對;基本上也用上了對偶的手法。內容方面,反映當前的實況。篇幅雖短,但整體看來,已是很不錯的嚐試。若能多寫多練,應有更佳的表現。

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